The new moon in Aries this past weekend was a tender one for many people. Though this energy is behind us, I find that Spring, while it ushers in fire, growth and forward movement, often bears a touch of sadness, grief and tenderness.
March and April are the two hardest months of the year for me. I’ve heard from other northerners that they feel the same. In Minnesota, March and April carry only a whisper of Spring. Rarely does Spring come in full force, instead, winter holds on with resilient claws. I appreciate this dance, a reminder of the power of death and rebirth. It’s beautiful, unparalleled even. It also brings a strange wave of melancholy.
Sixteen years ago I experienced an emotional trauma that surfaces each Spring, which is part of why April -though Spring is finally gaining an upper hand- still feels raw and vulnerable for me. Every April I get whiffs of the experience: the incense that were burning, the smell of my best friend’s perfume and the images of events that unfolded over those several weeks in April when I gained a new life but lost an old one.
The new moon in Aries last Friday was conjunct Chiron. Chiron is an asteroid known as the wounded healer. Wherever Chiron sits in your birth chart indicates the nature of your deepest wounds. Only by going into these wounds can we heal them. It’s through embracing this tenderness and pain that we reclaim lost and hurt pieces of our soul. Chiron is a difficult and painful teacher. Tender is the word I like for Chiron. Whenever I read Chiron placements in someone’s birth chart, I immediately see the expression and energy of my client shift. I’ve touched something and it’s tender. Then, I either see them open to the vulnerability of Chiron or they shut down and I know to move on. You can’t force yourself into pain you’re not ready for. I’ve tried a forceful hand and it doesn’t work; it only agitates the wound and causes more closure.
The wisdom here is to recognize that there’s vital information in your pain, in that space you don’t want to look at. You likely don’t want to look at it because you’re afraid of that pain. Reasonably so. I recently read a post on social media, “The love you seek is at the center of the emotion you are trying to avoid.” We avoid our pain. Of course we do. To the inexperienced mind, pain is unproductive- it holds nothing but undesirable sensations, discomfort and… well, pain. But pain is simply a barrier to untapped potential, a barrier protecting our wound. However, if we can lovingly cross that barrier and feel into what it’s protecting, there is a level of healing to be found that defies all logic.
The thing you least want to face, is the thing that holds the answers you are seeking. On the other side of your pain is the wisdom, the growth and the revelations your soul has been craving.
Chiron activates our wounds and brings pain. Wherever this new moon landed in your chart- wherever Chiron currently sits, house and sign, indicates where you are currently experiencing this “wounding” energy. Note that wounding energy is the same as healing energy: there cannot be healing without a wound.
For me, Chiron has been passing back and forth across the descendant angle of my birth chart for months now, pouring this “healing” energy into my 7th house of partnerships. Aries is a big part of my chart, being opposite my Libra ascendant and South Node. Chiron is revealing the wounds I’ve incurred from past relationships, particularly where I’ve given away my Aries autonomy and power. As I write this, Chiron currently hovers over my North Node in Aries, which activates my soul direction and reveals the wounds that hold me in unhealthy mental and emotional patterns, preventing me from stepping into my Aries power.
Where is Aries in your birth chart? What wound is Chiron currently activating? I’m offering a mini emailed reading specifically about Chiron in your birth chart. It’s $20 for a three paragraph write up, including reflection questions and advice on how to navigate your current Chiron transit. You can purchase it here.
Through your pain is the path to your greatest healing. I know it seems contrary to your natural instincts, which tell you to move away from pain. I can tell you from experience that your pain is a gift. It’s a secret entry point into the self-healing nature of your soul. When explored carefully and lovingly, this pain will lead you back to yourself and show you how to reclaim those lost and wounded pieces in exile.